final rock star review (proper one this time)

The lights go down around the arena and bliss by muse starts to play. Manson O’Gara walks onto the stage in front of the sellout crowd, wearing his smartest green fur suit, and purple jeans. As per usual, fireworks go off all around the arena and as Manson steps into the ring a huge lightshow decorates the audience. The lights dim once more and the ring sets on fire, with O’Gara stood in the middle strumming a guitar solo. As the flames go out Manson takes in the cheers from the audience.

Manson: Thank you thank you! Well here we are! The final Rock Star Review EVER!

The crowd cheer

Manson: (after a pause) Ladies and Gentlemen! (another pause) Rock Stars... and Rock Chicks (some ladies in the front row go crazy). Hahaha I’m going to miss that when I pass the show over. Some people said I was crazy coming out here to do one last Rock Star Review before I defend my Tag Team Title to possibly the only tag team that have ever really challenged me and my partner 0dysseu5, but you know, I wanted to do it for you! The fans! Those that have come out here tonight to see me give one of the most underappreciated members of our roster the rock star treatment!

The crowd go crazy

Manson: For your viewing pleasure, he is the only member of Classic Wrestling Federation’s board of directors to hold a championship belt. He beat the mad redneck at the last PPV, and he is my Boss. He is the one, the only, THE MANAGEMENT PLANNER!

The crowd boo

The lights in the arena go out - suddenly a golden light bathes the arena and
golden sparks shower down on the titantron, as
The Management Planner makes his way to the ring
wearing a navy blue Armani suit so fine, it makes Sinatra look like a hobo
the management planner is chauffeur-driven to the ring in a white stretch limousine
his trainer Tits McGhee gives him a quick massage before he steps into the ring
a golden light covers the champ as he strikes various poses for his fans

Planner: Shut up, can’t you see how good I look! Come see how good I look!

Manson: Wow what a responsibility I have here tonight! Not only do I have to give an interview to the top of the business, but also to our Classic Heavyweight Champion! (breathes out deeply) First off, what is it like, having all this responsibility, to put forward a lot of work and effort just to put on a crowd pleasing show?

Planner: I’ve always liked you Manson. (Crowd cheers). But you really can be a dumb-ass at times! (Crowd boos). You think I’m in this to put on a crowd-pleasing show? Hell, I’m in this for the money. And I’m making more than ever before, thanks to all these fans here tonight. Thank you! (Crowd boos again).

Manson: Well clearly it’s not all about the money? How did it all start for you? Did you wake up one morning and just decide you wanted to become a wrestler, or was it a long process?

Planner: Well it’s like this. See, I’ve been at the top of the business world for a long time – but I haven’t had any real challenges. Making money is so easy, I almost got bored of taking advantage of people. I said almost…

So one day I said to myself, ‘Planner, you’re lookin’ real good today. You should go out there and do something new. Something difficult. Something so far out of your comfort zone, you’ll wish you’d never started.

And that’s how I got into wrestling Manson – Tits McGhee was the one who suggested I give it a try, and the rest? Look around you now, I’ve created history and a half in the CWF.

Manson: We all know you love the revenue the crowd brings, but would you be open to including any sort of speciality brawl, where fans get to take on wrestlers for a prize?

Planner: Now I remember why I like you! That’s a great idea kid! Who here wants to face one of the CWF’s top superstars, live tonight in The Asylum? (Crowd cheers).

Manson, you came up with this idea – now run with it. I wanna see one of these people face a CWF Legend in this ring tonight. And I don’t wanna see any low-lifes like Hypnos or Killer Nurse here. I wanna see a real heavyweight take on one of these losers. Game on!

Manson: No disrespect sir but I’ve kind of got a title defence later tonight, and I’m sure everyone who already has a match booked is too prepared to deal with it.

Planner: maybe so, but if you want to do something good do it yourself kid! I can’t be expected to make all the calls when I’m off counting my money now can I?

Manson: erm...no? Now that you are the "champ" are you worried that people will be gunning for you from all angles?

Planner: Wait a minute. “Champ”? What are you trying to say? I’m the best wrestler in this building, and I’ve proved it time and time again! You’re just bitter because you lost your chance at the big time a while back, huh? Well face facts kid – I am the Champ. I am Perfection Personified. And I answer to no-one but myself. Worried? About who? (Planner looks around as a chant starts to grow…’Redneck, Redneck, Redneck’).

Manson: Let’s talk about The Mad Redneck, as he is clearly one of the crowd favorites here. Do you think it will be long before he gets back into full swing and takes that title belt off your hands?

Planner: The Mad Redneck? I’ve beaten him more times than you morons have had hot dinners! I’ll defend my title against anyone. A-n-y-o-n-e Manson. But if these idiots keep this up, I’ll do it behind closed doors, so no-one can see it! (Crowd boos again, and Planner gestures wildly at members of the crowd. It is clear he is getting frustrated by these questions and the crowds reactions)

Manson: OK! OK! Relax, erm moving on, if you weren’t a wrestler, what job would you have taken on?

Planner: I’d have just kept on making money, simple as. I might have bought my own island and created my own country, but apart from that? Money is what makes me tick people!

Manson: Finally, which wrestler would you most like to fight from the past, given the chance to do so?

Now that is a good question Manson, and one that I have given pause to recently...but the thing is, he's a real jackass. People actually pity him - his career has fallen so far off the radar, he may never get back on it again. (Manson - really? Who is it?) (Planner) (laughs quietly), Well...Manson...my ideal opponent would be…......you!”

Planner suddenly assaults a surprised Manson – he hits him twice with his microphone, grabs him, lifts him above his head and crashes him down in the middle of the ring. What a P45 from The Boss!

As the crowd boos furiously at the GM’s cowardly attack, he is smiling broadly, and as he bends down to pick up his microphone he leans in to talk to Manson’s twitching body.

“Meeting adjourned!”

The Management Planner’s music hits and he makes his way to his office slowly, savoring the reaction of the crowd. On his way back up the entrance ramp he grabs a ‘The Mad Redneck’ sign and tears it in half, spits on it, then walks off behind the curtain…